What’s your real name?

“What’s your real name?” One of the many questions I was asked by customers at the club. A question I would ask myself; Why was I stripping? I had absolutely no idea. I still have no idea why. I just did it. And guess what? I don’t need a fucking reason why. I didn’t need to be in debt, a struggling single mother, a drug addict, or whatever other reason society thinks strippers dance for.

I felt a connection to exotic dancing.

Stripping wasn’t something that just popped into my head one day. I studied it. I had thought about it over and over again since I was thirteen years old. I always heard that strippers were most likely sexually abused before they were dancers. Maybe that’s why I felt a connection to exotic dancing. I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my life by a woman and by men. Maybe that’s part of the reason why I took the path I did. 

I remember thinking about it, looking up pictures online, and watching movies with strippers in them to see what they looked like. When I was seventeen I tried auditioning at a club in Corona, CA. That was the first time I ever stepped foot into a strip club and saw a dancer in real life. You would think I would be terrified walking into some shady, small strip club by myself for the first time, but I wasn’t at all. (What in the hell was I thinking?!) I was underage, obviously, so I couldn’t work there. I was curious though. I knew they would kick me out but I just wanted to see it, even for a second.

The World of Pole Fitness

When I turned 18 years old I moved from Riverside, CA to Charlotte, NC. That’s when I discovered pole fitness. I researched pole dancing in the area and ended up driving past a pole fitness studio. I signed up immediately! I remember entering my first class and seeing the black lights, the beautiful poles, the loud music and feeling so excited. Class started and I instantly felt like I was home. It was the closest I have ever been to feeling sexy, enjoying my body, or appreciating myself. Being able to like yourself and your body is a very special feeling that I wish every person could have. It was the most empowering experience and it has turned into a wonderful career opportunity for me.

About a month into pole fitness I met an amazing woman who had just auditioned at a local strip club and was going to start working there. I asked a few questions, trying to act cool and not ask too many, but I knew I wanted to work with her. She was so supportive about me auditioning at the same club and answered all my questions. This was my way in and the start of a very interesting journey.

The Audition

I went to the audition, got nervous, and ended up going in as a customer. I sat in the back with a short skirt and some crazy high heels on, (I had no idea what to wear when applying to be a stripper). I talked to a man who was a regular there and he told me all about the club: his version of the rules, the actual rules, and introduced me to a few dancers that worked there. The next day, I went to actually audition. The manager gave me a tour of the club, and took me into the locker room to get ready for the audition. In order to get hired, I had to wear my club attire and dance on stage for two songs. During the second song, dancers are expected to dance topless. Getting myself to go on the stage was the hardest part. I kept staring at myself in the mirror in the locker room wearing black lace lingerie and 8 inch heels. I wasn’t nervous or scared. I was numb. I felt nothing. Once I was on stage, I was surprisingly calm. A customer came up to me on stage during my audition and I danced for him as if I knew what I was doing. I didn’t get scared, hesitate, or think about what move I was going to do next, I just did it. I got off the stage and started dancing for another customer at a table. The manager came over to the table, placed my paperwork down, and told me I was hired. Mid lap dance, I asked the manager what the rules were and how much dances cost. Immediately after signing the paperwork, I worked for a few hours, made $422 and headed home. Thankfully, I didn’t have any disrespectful customers that night, so the drive home wasn’t a bad one. I think the adrenalin was still kicked in. I didn’t know that there are bad nights where the depression hits as soon as you lay down in bed. I didn’t know what I was in store for. Fortunately for me, it was a while before I really felt lost. All I knew after my first day was I was about to make a lot of money. 

The First Club

The club was pretty expensive to work. The house fee (what you pay to work there each shift) was around $40-$100 depending on the day and time. The VIP dances were upstairs and cost $35 each, but the club takes $10. The table dances downstairs (regular lap dances) were $10 each which the dancers kept for themselves. At the top of every hour, the dancers get on stage all together like a runway show then get off to try and sell a VIP promotion of 2 dances for $50. At 10pm, all dancers have to go into the locker room and put on a floor length gown to wear for the rest of the night, unless they strip it off for a dance. The dances only last for one song and each song is about 2-3 minutes depending on the DJs playlist. You don’t get to choose your own music or choose when you go on stage. The DJ calls your name which means you’re up next on stage. You need to stop whatever you’re doing to get onto the stage by the next song. As a dancer with no prior experience, I was lost and confused for the first few shifts. After about a week or two, it became so easy. Doing the math, counting my money, and selling the dances was such an adrenaline rush. I wanted more money and more dances. I started to set financial goals for myself each night. For example, I would get there early and tell myself that I couldn’t leave until I made $400 that night. This kept me motivated and kept my mind on the money so I didn’t have to think about what I was actually there doing. I danced at that club for about a year, off and on, until I heard about a more upscale club where dancers were making a lot more. I heard the word “money” and drove right on over to the club and auditioned. I was in heaven. This club was so pretty. It was huge: it had a lobster cage, a four star restaurant, four bars, and tons of spacious VIP rooms. They seemed very professional and I was super excited to work there. This is where I became Whitney.